The Truman Show

Do you ever feel like life is a huge drama and you are just another person in it? I have quite a few times felt that way. That everything that happens in my life is staged or fake, put together by a director and when it involves other people they are simply "in on it" and I am the only one who isnt. At times I think that no way this can not possibly be real, what are the odds. Stuff that happens it just doesnt seem like it should, could, or would. I throw a football and it just happens to bounce off the ground and go straight up and hit the mirror on a car and break it off, what are the odds? I always wondering when things like that happen if someone secretely is video taping my reactions and broadcasting them to the world. Probably not. But sometimes that is what it seems like, that I am put into situations just to see what my reaction will be like and how I will react. Hence comes the title The Truman Show. Sometimes I really feel like Truman when he begins to figure out he is on TV and everybody is 'in on it' thats just how I feel sometimes.

The Founding Fathers and a quote from Mindy

I was looking into whether the founding fathers of America were chrisitan or not with Mindy for a U.S. Government project and Mindy said something that really struck me. We were talking about how most of them did not ever say that they were christian and in fact were very much self proclaimed Deists but how alot of the way they lived was based on christian principles and they would acknowledge that. Benjamin Franklin, a deist, said that christian morals and living seems to be the best way to live ones life and yet he himself was not a christian. Almost all of these founding fathers lived very good lives and had alot of integrity. But Mindy said something that got me thinking. she said "You can live good and not be a christian. You can even live the way a christian would and not follow Jesus. Christianity is more than just how you live but is a belief in Jesus as savior." I don't know what it was about it but it hit me like a ton of bricks. Maybe I have been so concerned with living "right" that I have forgotten my savior. Its not about our works, although that is part of it, it is about our faith and trust in Jesus as the savior. So just because the founding fathers lived an upright life, that doesn't make them christian. Maybe for too long I have based people as christian or non-christian by how they live. When really you can live a good and upright life and not follow Jesus at all.

A Generous Orthodoxy

Well I have been reading the book A Generous Orthodoxy and if you haven't read it, I would highly recommend it. It is very well written I have found and it is full of some amazing stuff that really gets you to think. I am only a few chapters into it and I can already tell that it will be a book to challenge me. He asked the question "If Jesus were here today would he be christian?" and he said something interesting. He answered and said that he doesn't think Jesus would be caught dead being considered a christian. Today the way christian is defined and the way christians act. It was just an interesting thought the he stated and it got me thinking. All of this is to say if you haven't read the book then you should.

Daniel, Peter, And Job

"Daniel broke the king's decree, Peter stepped from the ship to the sea, there was hope for Job like a cut down tree, I hope that there's such hope for me." I hope that there is such hope for me. Daniel broke the king's decree and was thrown to the lions and didn't get devoured. Peter walked on water and when the doubt came Jesus himself helped him up. Job endured his life being torn apart and it was all allowed by God and Job still praised God. Could I do the same, praise God after tons of shit happens to me. I hope and pray that if and when the trials come I can face them as Job and Daniel and Peter but sometimes I doubt and don't feel helped up. When I have stood up for God I get pushed back down. When the trials come I don't praise Him still. It so hard, sometimes I feel like I don't have a relationship with God but a struggle with Him. But it sounds so bad to say a 'struggle' it sounds negative and it isn't necessarily. Maybe I mean just that I struggle with the faith. I have doubts, fears, and I lack wisdom so it is my struggle with God. And besides saying relationship with God is so cliche. I think sometimes I just have to have the faith of a child in the darkest times. In the times among the lions, and walking on the stormy sea, and when shit happens to me maybe I should just have the faith of a child and just believe that He's going to be there for me. A child doesn't doubt that in the bad times the parent will be there, they know. Maybe faith like a child is required. Even in darkness the light still shines.

The Beginning Of The End

School started yesterday. I was actually dreading it. I guess I just wasn't really ready to go back. Its going to be a hard and at the same time an easy year. I have to take algebra 2 again and that is quite depressing. But I pray everyday that God will give me strength to work through the math. But at the same time I am having to pray for dillegence to do work in my multiple study halls. I have always struggled with being able to do work in them, and this year it seems as though I am definetely going to need the time to do homework but I always seem to not work during study halls so I really am going to need to learn to focus on the task at hand and get it done. 179 school days from now I will be graduating, that is a pretty crazy thought. I honestly growing up never thought I would make it through school. But I guess I was wrong.

Piano and Virb.com

I have always (well not always but for quite along time) wished I could play piano. Last night at Fasai's party there was a guy there who was studying classical piano in Russia and he was amazing. Last night I think I finally made up my resolve to learn piano and learn it well. I am going to be taking a class this year to learn the basics I guess and then I hope to kind of teach myself the rest. I basically taught myself guitar (apart from Darren and Alex's help). So I figure I can basically teach myself piano, once I've learned the basics, and then every now and then when I find someone who plays they maybe could teach me some. But I am going to do it. I am going to learn piano. I found that it is a great instrument to express lots of emotion in your music.

www.virb.com/coolhandluke check it out. amazing stuff from Cool Hand Luke. All will enjoy.

Dreadlocks picture

I am really not one for posting pictures and what not but since there are quite a few people asking about my dreads and for a picture, instead of emailing everyone I thought "hey, why not put up a picture on my blog, that'd be easy" so here is my first and hopefully last picture. Right now the dreads are alittle I guess crazy. I don't have any wax at the time, which is really annoying, but Jon is sending me some soon, and so I will go have them touched up and then I will begin to wax them. Indeed, they still are quite nice though, I love them. Well enjoy the picture.

Sadness, Happiness, and Cool Hand Luke

Well after the night at the foxes I have realized that I don't really like loud noises very much. It sounds kinda odd coming from me because I am quite loud myself but I think that I am starting to not like being really loud. Quiet seems alittle better to me. I believe that I am going to try and tone back alittle with my ridiculous loudness. I don't mind being loud when there is a time for it, during a game or what not, but all the time is kinda bothering me. So that is my nearly the end of august resolution, to become alittle bit quieter.

I have been listening to a few songs off of the new Cool Hand Luke album and I must say that it is some of their best work yet. If you haven't listened to CHL then you really should check them out because they are a bunch of amazing musicians. They just happen to be atop my favorites list. I think I like them so much because they are such nice guys. I met them at a show in Atlanta and they gave me a cd and I was happy. The show was really good too.

School is getting ready to start and I am partially looking forward to it. I am not excited because that means that I am going to be taking Algebra 2 again and I really don't want to. But school starting also signals the end of my last year of high school. And that is something to be excited over. But that also signals the soon to be graduation, and that is something to be excited over and yet quite sad over. I will be excited because I will have graduated, and yet I will be very very sad because I will then, most likely, be leaving and I am going to miss some people here alot. It will be hard for me to leave. I just might cry. And if you know me, that doesn't happen very often. But I think that at graduation I will be more sad than happy.

Cold Beer And Cigarettes

A white ghost, making his way up the west coast
Trying to focus his high hopes on a vagina or two
He's taking his chances
Meanwhile, back in his living room
Bright smiles are watching his toddler run speed trials
Over a grandmother's rug
And nature advances

Up the interstate
He's been awake
And pretty drunk for three whole days
No one wants to stop
Until they get to where they're going
I'll get to where I'm going pretty soon

So he takes another drink
'Cause watching the scenery bleed
Into each similar scene
Isn't as sweet as it had been in his dreams

It's faster to buy cigarettes and some cold beer
If you don't rattle the cashier
By asking her back to your room
She's calling security

Our car's on fire in the parking lot
And nobody wants it to rain
But God isn't listening
So all of the windshields glisten
The water and oil mix
Causing the fire to spread
To five or six innocent automobiles
Waiting in their nearby spots
What a cruel God we've got

Right on, right on, right on
Right on, right onRight on, right on, right on
Right on, right on

So he takes another drink
'Cause watching the formula bleed
Into each similar thing
Isn't as sweet as it had been in his dreams

Thats How I Remember

I go out in public now
More than you might think
But only after pills and drinks
Thats how I remember
And if I see any girl
Ive ever met before
I run like hell for the door
Thats how I remember
Memory records
Selected shorts
And interpretations
Then later plays them back
As gospel fact
Thats how I remember
Thats how I remember
With one eye open
You can focus like a camera
On whomever you are capturing
Without exception I prefer it
As a way to document
The objects of my interest
Red and yellow
Black and white
Are precious in his sight
But who he roots for in a fight
Thats how I remember
So every time I find a girl
Beaten, gagged and bound
I let her go and write it down
Thats how I remember
Thats how I remember

Jesus, Youth Group, and Pedro The Lion

Youth group this past week was really good I thought. I ended up playing a few Pedro The Lion songs for worship. The Longer I Lay Here, The Well, Be Thou My Vision, Silent Night were the songs that I played. And I quite enjoyed singing them. There is something about singing pedro songs at youth group that I enjoy. Rachel spoke for us and I very much enjoyed what we did because it got me to think. We did this beginning of a bible study that Rachel has been working through and we studied the passage of scripture when the rich young ruler comes to Jesus and asks what he must do to get to heaven. He kept all the laws but the one thing that he could not do was sell all he had. What got me thinking was that Jesus could have said "it is not about your works but about your faith in me." But instead He gives the man one more thing to do, and for this man it is the one thing that will hold him back. Why did Jesus give the man another task to accomplish instead of just saying "believe and me and you will be saved" ? It just got me thinking and wondering why Jesus said that. Most christians have never even heard of this opportunity (someone coming to them and asking them point blank what must I do to inherit eternal life?) and most would be quick to make the way easy to become a believer in Jesus. But Jesus, He seems to make the way one step harder. Its just something to think about, Jesus didn't always give people the easy way but there is going to be great sacrifice. But I had never thought about that passage this way. It gave good things to think about.

Tunings

For the guitar players out there, check out this open tuning. Instead of tuning EADGBe tune it CGCGCe The EAD stings tune down and the B tune up half a step. Open C tuning friends. It is quite alot of fun to play in. I have been enjoying it alot. So if you have yet to use it, go out and try Open C tuning.

Alone, Rapture, and Da Vinci

Being alone is quite nice. My parents have gone to Bangkok for a few days with the family and I opted to stay back, watch the dog and take care of the house. It is really nice because it is so quiet and peaceful. Not to say that it isn't good having my family home but I have realized that it is good to be alone sometimes. All the time would be bad (at least for me) but every now and then is quite good.

I am nearly finished writing my guitar instrumental i have been working on for ages. I have had a base idea for it but just recently decided to finish what I started and complete it. Which by the way is a good thing, we should always finish what we start. Never leave a job half done. I am listening to Pedro at the moment. More specifically the song Rapture. I really don't understand this song, I would love to know why David Bazan wrote it, but at the moment all I can say is it is a bit strange of a song.

I finished reading The Da Vinci Code and I must say it was a fantastic book. I am not sure why people gave it so much crap. I mean sure it is about Christ and isn't very, not even sure what word to use, respectful I guess. But it is just another conspiracy theory. I mean I guess it is sacrilegious in a way but still, it was hated by most christians. Now it could throw alot of doubts into your mind, but I find that it is good to know what other people think of Christ and who He was and what He did. Knowing that and listening to what somebody has to say about it doesn't change my own beliefs but I then have an understanding of where other people are coming from. It was interesting to read this book that shared 'facts' (though I have never heard any of them outside of this book). Alot of the book is opinion and supposed 'facts' about God and Christ that were put into a novel form. It was quite interesting to read it and find out that people actually believe alot of what the book had to say. Sad but interesting. But like I said earlier, I thought the book was fantastic and would recommend it to anyone seeking a good conspiracy theory.

Dreadlocks

I have finally gotten my dreadlocks. I am stoked. They are pretty puffy and sticking out all over the place now because they are brand new but they should within a week after my first wash calm down a bit and lay more flat. until that time I am going to have them pulled back a good bit. but thats comfortable so thats ok. I have dreads! It is just so exciting.

Competitiveness

So why is it that people get so competitive over the littlest and smallest of games? Sure being alittle competitive isn't bad, sometimes it helps you play better but when you lose why is it such a big deal? Whats the purpose behind getting upset over a game being lost? During the game that is slightly understandable but after the game is over there is no reason to be upset because there is nothing to be done. The score is set, the game is over, and you lost. What do people think to accomplish by getting upset after a game? Maybe they expect the "ref" to say to himself 'you know that kid is right, the game shouldn't have turned out that way, so I will take it upon myself to erase the score of the other team.' is that what people expect? All I am wondering and I guess getting at is that I think it is stupid to be upset about losing a small stupid game such as musical chairs, or dodge ball, or tug-of-war. It doesn't accomplish anything and it sets a bad example to other people. I think I am resolved to not get upset over stupid pointless games, and even not get upset during games period. That would be so wonderful, if everybody enjoyed playing and didn't care about the rules and logistics and it being "fair" but just enjoyed getting to play a game. Not all competitiveness is wrong, just at certain times it is alittle pointless to become competitive and upset. That's all for the day folks.

John Butler Trio

Alright here is a musician for the world to enjoy. This group is an amazing bunch of musicians. John Butler is Australian and he plays along side one of the best drummers I have ever heard and an upright bass player. Together they form a band that people should not miss out on. Check it out www.purevolume.com/johnbutlertrio Enjoy the beautiful sounds and wonderful lyrics. Also he has an amazing guitar solo called Ocean on youtube for you to go and see.

Well this week has pretty much just flown by. Last Friday seemed like it was just yesterday. Last Friday I spent my morning helping out at the ESL camp and then the rest of the day I went to the smoothie shop to just chill with Janel and Mindy. That was pretty fantastic, a whole bundle of fun. We played scrabble and after I spelled the word 'Quota' the tide was turned in my favor and no one could stop my incredible letter combining abilities. And now it is Friday again, except this time it did not yield a wonderful scrabble game. Today I did nothing but sit around and chill at home. Besides the ESL camp in the morning. Soon, as in around and about one week, I will be getting my dreadlocks. This will make me happy, I have been dying to get them and finally I have acquired the money to get them. Joy.

So just sit back and relax. Enjoy it while you still have it. Don't look back on life, man and only see tragedy 'cause, you can be better than that. Let it get the better of you. What could be better than that? Life's not about what's better than. --John Butler Trio

Rice Planting

Well this morning I went rice planting. It was alot more fun than I thought it was going to be. I figured it was going to be ridiculous boring or alot of work and I wouldn't really get to see the fruits of my work. But when the time came to be done I had realized that I really enjoyed it. I had also came to the notion that it was pretty therapeutic. I mean it was really great, as long as I wasn't worried about the blood sucking leeches. Which, don't do like me and believe everything you hear, there were none of. An experience to go down in the books as a good one for sure.

Music is an amazing thing. I have always be an admirer of wonderful music, of piano, guitar, violin, bass, flute, and many other wonderful music making pieces. I have just I guess been realizing how much I love music and making music. It is especially wonderful making music with the best of friends. Making music with your best friends is amazingly great. There is something about that that is just soothing to the soul. We are the music makers and we are the dreamers of dreams.

Quotes

Here are some of my most favorite quotes of all time. They are from lyrics, speeches, and just common everyday sayings. Enjoy.

"if ever you come near I'll hold up high a mirror Lord, I could never show you anything as beautiful as you"

"Isa ruhu-lah 'alaihis-salat was-salam"

"A glass can only spill what it contains"

"before my doubting eyes the Infinite appears in time-the Unquestionable is questioned but makes no reply"

"open wide my door, my door, my Lord(open wide my door)to whatever makes me love You more"

"if she comes circling back we'll end where we'd begun like two pennies on the train track the train crushed into one"

"God is love and love is real"

"This is love: that you would die for me"

"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent"

"If I’m going to help you, I must make it very clear, brother that I love you but certainly I hate your sin"

"Be Thou my vision, O Lord of my heart"

"Sweet Jesus, I need you, forgive me this sin, not hookers or heroin, gamblin' or gin. It sounds so ridiculous but I just can't lick this. I need a miracle, someone to help me help myself. Someone to help me help myself."

"There's always trouble so tell yourself again that help is on the way and safety abounds, that safety abounds."

"Red and yellow, black and white are precious in his sight, but who does he root for in a fight?"

"We are mere children of history, no purpose or place. We have no great war, no great depression. Our great war is a spiritual war, and our great depression is our lives."

"They do not see what lies ahead when sun has failed and moon is dead"

"Christ is not a fashion fleeting away"

"Brothers and sisters..."

"Indeed"

"It's true they did not move me, my heart was hard and tired. Their perfect fire annoyed me, I could not find You anywhere"

"I still want to trust you"

"Oh, what good is it to live with nothing left to give. Forget, but not forgive and not loving all you see"

"Don't answer life in a bullet proof vest with the windows all closed"

"I fell in love again"

"When you're happy I am too and when you're sad I'm with you"

"Emotional attachment is not a threat"

"We live in a beautiful world"

So yea, these are some of the quotes that have just stuck with me when I heard them. Quite a few of them are from song lyrics so I am not quite sure if that counts as a quote but I am going to say that it does.

Movie thoughts

Well I have been thinking about movies a good bit lately. I have been just thinking about why I watch certain movies for entertainment. I don't necessarily mean me only but people in general, why do we watch the movies that we do for entertainment? Why is it that we watch movies filled with murder, lies, hate, revenge, deceit, and all around sin. Why do we entertain ourselves on the very things that Christ came and died for? I know it is fun to watch a movie such as Oceans 11 or The Italian Job, where there is an impossible robbery committed and gotten away with. But why do we find that entertaining? Is it the fact that we know that we could never do anything of the sort for real? Do we secretly fantasize about committing things of the sort, but we know that we would never really do it? That is what I have been questioning my self on. I am not saying that it is a sin to watch those kinds of movies, but all I want to know is why do we? that's all, just some movie thoughts.

Lets be the perfect Christ followers and wear christian shoes

Do you ever feel like Christianity is so dressed up? Read this article and you will understand where I am coming from. http://cola-leicht-trinker.blogspot.com/2007/07/be-winner.html

Now, what on earth do shoes have to do with Christianity? I mean is it really about the shoes being christian? What makes the shoes christian? what makes the pants christian? What makes the bags christian? Doesn't being christian mean that you are a Christ follower? Because if that is the meaning (and we are going to say that it is) then how do shoes become christian? If I am not mistaken Christ did not wear shoes and if He did they were most likely small cheap-o sandals. So my thinking is why would I want christian merchandise? I think that my faith is going to be based on my heart and my attitude and how I act, not what I am wearing. I don't want people looking at my outward appearance judging if I am christian. I don't them to look at my shoes and think to themselves "oh yea he is definitely christian. Look he has prayer hands and the words 'blessed' on his shoes, he must be christian." I want them to look at my attitude and the way I act and how I live out my life. If people can't see that I follow Christ through my daily acts and how I choose to live my life then something is wrong. It just distresses me to see all the "christian" products on the market. People go to a music store and see that a band is in the christian section and won't even pick it up. That is terrible, why does christian music have to be looked at as so different from secular music. From what I have seen and listen to, it is not much different from secular music. The lyrics are different sure, but the music side of it is better, the producing is fantastic, there is no real difference and it makes me sad to see that people won't even go into the christian section of music to look for Cd's. It actually makes me sad that we have to make a difference between the two. Why can't Pedro The Lion, Coldplay, and Sufjan Stevens all be sold on the same shelf? Why must there be a distinction between them? Within christian music there are distinct differences between worship and rock and indie and...etc. Why? Worship should come from the heart, so who is to say that Norma Jean is any less worship than Steven Curtis Chapman? If I was Martin Luther I would post a thesis on the church doors. These have been just some thoughts in my mind.

Today is the day

So today I have finally gotten (yes gotten is a word) a blog site. I have been strongly opposed to getting a myspace and therefore have refrained from all types of blogs, but today I have now gotten a blog spot. This is the first post. Today is the day!